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Maternity Holiday

James

I start back at work next Wednesday for a five-day fortnight after having a year’s maternity leave.  With our family now complete I am becoming quite nostalgic about the past year spent wholly with James.

In typical fashion I feel somewhat disappointed that I haven’t accomplished all that I had hoped to achieve in my year off – such as starting a new business and returning to study.  However, I’ve had a reality check and I have accomplished a great deal – I have nurtured a 37 week old baby that only weighed 2.030 kilos into a budding boy of 10 kilos, 11 months later.  I have fed him, changed him, played with him, nurtured him as well as care for a vivacious three-year old.

I do feel blessed to have had the opportunity of this precious time with our children as I was fortunate in my work circumstances to access maternity and my long-service leave, so financially it was a viable option.

It hasn’t all been a bed of roses however – there have been dreadful isolating moments, where I questioned my whole identity and what my life had become (ground-hog day) and those sleepless nights that left me feeling sick at 7am wondering how I was going to get through another day with two little ones?  I was often envious of Nick going to work, but the grass is always greener.  Those gorgeous little smiles or giggles they give you washes away those frustrating times.

I do feel ready to get back into a professional context now – to be immersed in work and not be interrupted every five minutes.  To liaise with a broader cross-section of the community – those that are not necessarily your friends or fellow mums where you can just talk about sleep, nappies and teething.  I long to talk about the tourism industry, politics and current affairs again.

I feel excited but at the same time a little sad – this week is the last time I get to fully be with my little man before he goes off to the big wide world of daycare, with shared sickness and days spent without his Mum.

He will always be my little boy (can I say that out loud?) Xx

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